can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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