Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
