He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
How does it feel to date your dad?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
