Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Fuck me I smell like cheese
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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