turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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