Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i wish my penis had a tongue
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
