Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
