OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
