found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
