No awkward lesbian experiences without me
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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