and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
