my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i used baking grease as lip gloss
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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