I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
