He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
i think my cat just said my name.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize