I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I love having hate sex.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
