what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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