he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize