We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
