he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
you told grandpa to call you daddy
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize
