I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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