theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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