Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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