She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize