I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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