I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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