i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
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