Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
