my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
