I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
