Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
