My cat gives me a boner
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
