Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
