Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
