i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize