I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
