handjob tips. give me some.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
