Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
