rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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