I want to make a zoo with you.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
The struggles of a small town man whore
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
