I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.Â
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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