At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
