she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
