i just google imaged poop.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
