You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
