I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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