wrigley field is MILF paradise
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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