He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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