It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
