Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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