your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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