Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize